I do think you will never loose the feeling like home to me. It hurts so much to think I’ll never get to your version of my home back. But I also know, you better never come back to try to love me again. As Alex learnt with Izzie, you’ve showed me that I deserve that much better. SO-MUCH-BETTER. I also think one gets a quorum of times a guy gets to break one’s heart. You’ve definitely filled yours. So please, even if you only do it for respect to the stuff I’ve had to put up with this last five years, don’t ever play with me again. You’ve made clear how little you care to have me in your life. Don’t think you can make that unclear to me ever in the future. The fuckery has been made. I wish to believe I’m not so stupid to go through you again. Even if my idiotic heart thinks the risk cost was definitely worth, my feelings can’t go through you breaking me again. I don’t think I will ever deserve to go through the punch in the heart by the person I’ve loved the most a third time. I expected so much more of you, dude. So much more. The least, some caring. I guess one just can’t trust on care, can she.

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